Ophiucus

Some of my friends are having a crisis with their social life.

These problems were not visible to me until today. At first, I thought I was the only one having all the stress and trouble this semester that had affected my attitude towards other people.

Some of my friends have expressed their feelings through various media. One of which used the blog to express it, another told others about the feeling, some just used verbal communication to do it.

Most of them were telling me about the same thing, we are getting irritated with one or two of their closest friends. Kinda funny you think? Sometimes, when we have been already too close to other people we often see their dark side too. The dark side, of course, is not something that we had expected to see especially from the people we trust.

Let’s just say that most people usually overestimate their closest friend as the most trustworthy friend they have until they found out that their most trusted friend often badmouthed them. Others overestimated about their friends ability to judge or befriend with them. While, other group felt that they are being used by their closest friend.

I did experience these things and I’ve got to admit they’re not easy to handle. Most of the problems cured themselves as time goes by, some went away together with our trust, and some just remained like a chronic disease.

It is how we handle these problems that matters. We have to introspect and see deep inside our heart then judge whether it is me who have problem or they?

I am 91.1 kg.

This is a very beautiful and romantic song. The first time I heard it, it was sung by Melinda Doolittle in American Idol. At first, I didn’t really like it. After hearing it twice, I found that this song was amazing.

I’ve already have 5 version of this song. My first version is by Ella Fitzgerald which is the complete version and also the best version for me. Melinda Doolittle get the second place for her rendition of My Funny Valentine. I like Frank Sinatra’s and Chet Baker’s, but I don’t think this song suited Michael Bublé.

I am 91.1 kg.

Argh…

This week has been a dreadful week. It started on Monday with all the hectic preparation of my group’s fermentor and continued on Tuesday and Wednesday where I overdid my own obligation with that thing. Not to mention the "explosion" that happened on Wednesday morning.

The problem continued with the hunt for the unknown, unclassified and underestimated orchids for my Friday reports. The search took hours and so much money needed to be spent for that.

On Friday, I have to prepare myself for today presentation and the presentation that I’ve prepared didn’t work well. To be honest, I don’t see any defects in my product or my marketing strategy. I think the judges don’t quite get the insight of the situation and condition of dengue infection and outbreak in Indonesia. Heck, I don’t think they really understand what endemic means.

And so, my already-getting-well condition from rhinitis and cough is rapidly declining to a painful sore throat which has commenced its attack on me since Thursday morning. I’ve tried to boost my immune system with vitamin C and green tea, but none have shown significant result. Poor me ^_^.

Well,I have to improve my condition soon. I still have a Bioreactor presentation on Monday morning and BMKP lab final exam on Tuesday.

I am 91.5 kg.

Sometimes I feel so alone in this world. I do know that my enemies hate me (well which enemy doesn’t?), but sometimes those who I call friends left me too.

Often I feel that I don’t fit in.

I admit that I am a selfish person, but if you’re a friend of mine, please remind me. Don’t just leave me over there like a fool waiting for you guys to speak to me or respond to my speech.

I am a perfectionist. You might feel uneasy around me. I ask too much maybe? Then tell me if you feel burdened. I can help you too. But please don’t just leave me standing all alone by myself.

I am a power abuser. Yes, I am. But please pull me back down to earth if my head has flown too high.

I am a negative thinker. I do see things in a dark perspective. So please shed a light on my mind so I can see a brighter world out there.

I am stupid. So teach me. I am not quickwitted, I am slow. Help me learn new things.

I speak harshly. Remind me to be gentle to people.

Friendship is not only a one-sided relation. Don’t just use me when you need me. I’ll feel sad. If you only want my stuff please stop fooling me.

Yours truly.

I am 90.9 kg (geez).